So crazy it works

Recently we had one of those idyllic Saturday afternoons. The weather was unseasonably warm, we had no plans, the whole family just hanging out in the backyard.

"Gee," I remarked rather pointedly, "The neighbor's dog pooped in our yard again."

"Hm." responded The Mister, noncommittally.

"It sure would be a shame if someone stepped in it. It would get all over the house. All those germs. I sure wouldn't want to have to..."

The Mister heaved a big sigh. "I'll get it."

Victory! I thought. He trotted off, presumably to get a shovel and a plastic bag. My eyebrows rose a little when he returned with...a pile of sticks? They shot straight up into my hairline as he proceeded to use the sticks to build an elaborate fence around the poop.

"There!" He says with great satisfaction. "Now no one will step in it."

We've dubbed it The Poop Tree, and it's well on it's way to becoming a beloved family landmark.

"OK, kids, you can play outside. But stay away from the Poop Tree."

Let's face it, once you've named something it can be hard to get rid of it. Like our new pet, for instance:

His name is Clyde. What, you can't see him very well? Here's a close up:

Yes, Clyde is deer tick. I recently found him crawling on Isabel's shirt. If you don't know me in real life; you may be wondering why I trapped Clyde under a glass and named him, rather than just flushing him down the toilet like any normal human being. If you do know me in real life; you are probably just laughing because you know that I have a long and illustrious history of trapping insects under glasses. This is ostensibly so that I can identify them properly, but in truth it is because I have this morbid vision wherein my loved one has been bitten by an insect and I am running down the hospital corridors alongside the gurney and the doctors are shouting, "But did you save the tick???" And I triumphantly lift the glass in the air and save the day. It could totally happen. Also, I think letting insects suffocate slowly to death sets a good example to all the other insects.

Of course, after time it starts to backfire on me. The longer I leave Clyde under the glass, the more menacing he seems. Eventually, he starts talking to me in this cartoonish Brooklyn accent, "Eh, lady! Lemme outta this glass so I can bite your daaawtah!"

Yes, all ticks are from Brooklyn. And all mosquitoes are Mexican. The point is, and I do have a point, wait, no, I really don't have a point. Except that underneath this I've-got-it-together Mommy exterior lies a big swirling batch of crazy. And I'm beginning to suspect that the Mister has his own little batch of crazy brewing, too. Maybe that's why we work.

Movie Review: The Lives of Others

I don't generally go for subtitled films, but I don't categorically avoid them either. I think the last one I saw was "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon" . I like "good" movies, but sometimes I enjoy crappy movies too. I'm pretty shameless when it comes to cheesy blockbusters and romantic comedies. I saw Titanic four times in the theater. And any movie about dancing or cheerleading has pretty much got me sold, no matter how bad.

The Lives of Others is a "good" movie; by which I mean that "critics and people who take movies seriously liked it". I like "good" movies, too, as long as they are not overly dark or disturbing. Screw that. I don't watch movies to become disturbed. The one possible exception being Donnie Darko, which was just disturbing enough.

And, wow, I just realized that I have no idea how to write a film review. The Lives of Others was a great one. You should see it. It does have some nudity during sex scenes, which usually really turns me off. But this was tastefully done and not gratuitous. But if that's a deal breaker for you, be warned. You can follow the link above to read reviews by some actual review-y types. If you're looking for a movie that will get stuck in your head all day (and make you very very grateful that you do not live in 1980's East Germany) I recommend it.

UPDATE: If you follow the link above to the Rotten Tomatoes page, do NOT read the full synopsis of the movie, as it pretty much gives away the entire plot. How crummy!

Is this what Awake feels like?

So we went to see our pediatrician yesterday for Isaac's nine month check up. He told us on no uncertain terms that a nine and a half month old is old enough to sleep through the night. He said that if I choose to keep getting up with him three times a night it will not cause any psychological damage or anything like that, but it is not necessary at this point. He also delicately asked whether Isaac was making up for the lost sleep during the day. Nope. And you know what? The little guy is just looking tired lately.

I feel really ready for sleep training now. I've said that before, but I feel ready for it in a new way. So last night I went downstairs and slept on the couch. My super stud of a husband offered to go in every half hour that Isaac was crying and reassure him. And you know what? We all slept wonderfully. I haven't slept for five hours in a row like that for oh, I don't know, about nine and a half months? And the Mister said he didn't have to get up once. Isaac woke up in a great mood at 6:45 am and we are like a bright, shiny new family.

I am fully prepared for the possibility that this was a tremendous fluke and that we are going to be in for the fight of our lives when we try it again tonight. But you know what? I'll take it.

Toddlers + Too much rain = Crazy

Well I am working on a hugegantic post about my weekend, but I wanted to quickly share a super fun activity that we just discovered.

First off, I want to say that I love my job. I cannot think of anything I would rather be doing every day than taking care of my family. But today was just one of those days. Isaac was nuts because he missed his morning nap, and Bella was nuts because the weather was bad and she hadn't been outside all day. I was just nuts, and we were all feeding off of each other's moods. You could cut the crazy with a knife around here.

The solution? Pudding painting! Now I am sure that many an innovative Mommy has come up with this idea before, but it was a new one for us. I took off the kid's shirts, put Bella at the table with a cup of pudding and a pastry brush, and let her go to town. I put Isaac in his high chair and opened a tub of Gerber sweet potatoes and let him do the same. They painted the tables, chairs, themselves, and each other. They had so much fun.

I'll admit I had to hog-tie my inner neat freak and sit on her for about twenty minutes. You can't start a mess like that and then expect to keep it under control. I kept finding myself saying, "No no...not in your...oh my...not the...aw, hell..."

But you know what? Totally worth it. By the time they were done and bathed, we were like a different family. And I have an ace up my sleeve for this afternoon. We are going to blow up the air mattress and jump around on it, then build a fort. Did I mention that I love my job?

So how do you pass your rainy days? I'd love to hear any suggestions. I'm running low on pudding.

In which she posts a million pictures

Well I've been out of it for a while, as we've just had a nasty cold sweep through our house. And before that I was helping my Mom throw a Super Fabulous Tea Party. And by "helping" I pretty much mean "making elaborate To-Do lists and then losing them".

For those of you who don't know my Mom; this woman knows how to party. She had trouble deciding on a theme, so she picked four of them. Unfortuantely, I was only able to get really good pictures in two of the rooms due to light constraints.

There was really dim lighting in the Moroccan room. She draped the whole room in lush fabrics and scattered pillows around the coffee table.

In the dining room she set up a Traditional English Tea. She got out the good silver and fancy china and I actually got to use the soup tureen I got as a wedding gift!

(soup tureen not pictured)

Briah and I were stoked that there was an Asian themed room. Any excuse to wear a Kimono!

Yummy spring rolls in the Asian Tea Room:

My favorite theme, however, was the Mad Hatter's Tea Party:

These streamers were made out of regular playing cards, paper doilies, and pictures from the original book that I found here, colored in, and mounted on cardstock.

She had the centerpiece done by a local florist:

Yes, the cupcakes say "Eat Me"

I guess I am posting all of this because when Mom asked for help with planning the decorations, I spent a lot of time scouring the Internet for ideas and really did not find much. Also this has really inspired me to start planning my own tea party sometime this spring. Though mine will probably be a lot more kid friendly!

Hey, Coolio!

So I was picked by Audra to be the lucky recipient of a super special Pay It Forward gift. She was picked by Melissa, and now I get to pick...you?



Here's how it works. Leave me a comment on this post and in a few days I will randomly pick three people to receive a special gift in the mail. It will probably be something homemade and crafty, because I live for that stuff. All you have to do is pass on three PIF gifts of your own, through a blog if you have one, or just to random friends if you prefer.

Spreadin' the love, man...

Ours is a Forbidden Love

Mr. Monkeysparkets walks into the kitchen while I am Swiffering and wrinkles his nose.


“That stuff stinks”

I blink fast.

“What did you just say??”
“I said that stuff stinks. It smells like rotten oranges.”


A few moments of stunned silence go by. Eventually I ask in a small voice,


“Does it bother you?”
“What?”
“The Swiffer. Does the smell really bother you?”
“Nah. It goes away after a while.”
“Oh, good.”


He raises an eyebrow.

“Honey, if you had to choose between me and the Swiffer…”
“Never ask me that question.”
“Fine. But if I come home and find it in the bedroom, I am not going to be OK with that.”

Adventures in Lesson Planning

I’ve run across a few great preschool activity websites that I’d like to share.
Most of these were recommended to me by our neighbor, who is a former preschool teacher. I am hoping to get a home daycare business off the ground in the next few months, and am beginning to experiment with lesson plans and schedules and such. I hope to follow more of a structured routine when I start doing daycare, and we are beginning to ease ourselves into that routine now so it won’t be too big of a change for any of us.

I have started off with very simple themes. So far we have done a different letter sound every day. I will print out a few coloring pages that correspond to that letter sound, and pick two crafts that correspond as well. I usually only get to one of the crafts, but I’ve found it’s best to have one in reserve just in case. You never know whether something will capture their attention for twenty minutes or two minutes!

So far I haven’t done very much planning in advance. Usually the night before I will spend about ten minutes printing out what I need; then do all the cutting and prep work for the various crafts while Isabel is working on the coloring pages. That will have to change when I have more kids. I also hope to have my themes and activities planned out a month in advance. It will all depend on the ages of the particular kids I get.

I’m also trying to build up my repertoire of indoor fitness activities. This site had some neat ideas. A few days ago we had an all-day deluge and I got to test out a bunch of them. I was surprised at the ones that held her attention. Paper plate skating was fun, but it only lasted about two minutes. Ribbon dancing, however, got her moving for an entire Raffi album. It got me to work up a sweat as well-bonus!
All in all, I am really excited about this opportunity. Isabel is having the best time with our new routine. I wish I had started doing more of these types of activities with her earlier. It always seemed a little overwhelming. But having a few good websites with free printables has made it a breeze. If you’re thinking about starting a home daycare, or if you just want to spice up life with a preschooler, I can’t recommend them enough.

I found these duck templates on the First-School site. They are meant to be used on a felt board, but I attached magnets to the backs and stuck them to a cookie sheet. She loved it. We used them to act out the Five Little Ducks song, practiced counting forward and backward, talked about Big versus Little...you get the idea.

Here are sites I've been using the most often:

• http://www.first-school.ws/ I particularly like the alphabet worksheets on this one
• http://www.dltk-kids.com/ Great Bible themed crafts. They also have good ideas regarding taking a paper craft and making it appropriate for different age groups.
• http://teach-nology.com/ I actually haven't explored this one too much, but they have some unusual coloring pages I am looking forward to trying.
• http://www.kinderart.com/ A little more commercial-y (does that make sense?). But has some neat project ideas.

That's about the it. If anybody out there has any good ideas, I'd love to hear them. Enjoy!

Letters to Isaac, Month 9

Dear Isaac,

Today you turn 9 months old. Holy smokes, little one, how did that happen? All of a sudden you are a Big Baby. I’ve had to get all of the Big Baby toys out of storage. Of course, you still prefer your sister’s toys over those boring baby things. Or better yet, finding practically invisible dirt on the floor and eating it. Lately that particular activity has become your reason d’etre. I vacuum every single day, yet you always manage to find a spot I’ve missed. The other day, I swear, you crawled to the edge of the area rug, lifted it up, found a clump of dirt underneath, and had it halfway to your mouth before I could get to you. How do you do it, buddy?

Sometimes I feel bad that I tend to describe you by comparing you to your sister. It just amazes me how different you two are. Where she has always been a thinker and a plotter; you are a go-er and a getter. While she tests out new experiences with one toe before jumping in; you shut your eyes and do a cannonball. You have picked up the army crawl with lightning speed. You barrel around the house with little to no caution and an alarming excess of curiosity. I have no idea what I am going to do when you are faster than I am.

It’s hard to believe that you are going to be a year old in three months. Your dad and I are really looking forward to the big Family Birthday Bash we are going to throw. I have a feeling that you are going to rock it out, little man. We had so much fun with you on Christmas. Your sister was a bit overwhelmed by it this year, and treated us all to a healthy dose of two year old temper. But you? You squealed appropriately at all your presents, didn’t eat too many pine needles off of the tree, and even obligingly sacked out on your great grandma’s lap toward the end of the morning.

All in all, you are an absolute delight. I am so enjoying watching you discover the world. You take such unbridled pleasure in each and every new experience. You absolutely love solid food, and are chomping at the bit to try finger food. Quit growing up so fast, kiddo! You are beginning to babble, and whenever you see your Daddy, you break into an ecstatic “Da da da da!” You have that man wrapped around your little fingers. And you are so much like him already, it’s uncanny. Not only are you his spitting image, but you are very alike in temperament. Ninety nine percent of the time, you are two of the most easygoing, laid back people I have ever met. That other one percent of the time, when you have really set your mind on something, God help anyone who stands in your way. I’ve never met anyone more stubborn!

Speaking of which, little man, can we just talk about the sleep thing? Because seriously, I am getting tired. You are still pretty much up every two to three hours all night. Sleep training has been an unmitigated disaster. Your Dad and I are gearing up for another desperate attempt, as we really don’t want to be doing this when you are two. So have a heart, honey. I can promise you a much happier, more patient Mommy once we get this thing figured out. With that being said, I have really been enjoying our mornings together. You are up between five and six, while your sister usually sleeps until seven or eight. It guarantees me a little precious alone time with you every day, and I wouldn’t trade that for anything. I can’t wait to see what next month will bring us, and though I can’t imagine you being any more delightful, I’m sure you will be.


You are the heart of my heart,

Mama

Letters to Isabel, Month 33

Dear Bella Boo Who,

Today you turn 33 months old. I can’t believe it has been this long and I have yet to write you one of these letters. You have grown and changed so much, and the time has just flown. I wish I could go back and write you one for each precious month. There is already so much I’ve forgotten. And sometimes it’s hard to realize that you won’t remember any of this. The hours we spent pacing the floors together when you were tiny, those two weeks when you would only sleep on my chest while I sat in the rocking chair, the way your sharp, clever little mind takes in everything around you.

But let’s just stick with this month, eh kidderino? You continue to be one of the smartest, most verbal two year olds I’ve ever met. Your new favorite word is “acceptable”. I have no idea where you picked it up, but you actually use it properly in sentences. Any time you ask for anything now it’s, “is that acceptable, Mommy?” Hilarious. You still mix your pronouns up most of the time (“You” means “Me” and vice versa) but you are starting to change that. Thaaat’s a little confusing. But we will get there.

You also continue to be obsessed with cars and ducks. You’ve displayed a passing interest in the Disney Princesses, but you still prefer Lightning McQueen. And that’s cool. I love that about you. But I get so frustrated about how kids’ things are so polarized by gender these days. Cause you know what? You also really dig tutus, ballerinas, and make up. In fact, a few days ago I saw you trying to put a tutu on one of your trucks. When I tell people about your love of all things wheeled, they tend to nod knowingly and say “Ah, a tomboy.” And I usually don’t bother to reply. Because when I explain that your intensely unique personality just can’t be summarized by one word like that they usually nod again and say, “Don’t worry, she’ll grow out of it.”

I hope you never do, darling. Because what I see in you is a determination not to be a cliché. You like what you like, whether you are supposed to or not. Good for you. I hope you never feel like you have to fit anyone else’s mold. You are an amazing little person, and every day that I get to know you a little better is a privilege.

This month we’ve seen you get back on the potty training horse. I am still determined to not turn this into a power struggle (cause let’s face it, I’m not sure if I would win). But I’m also looking forward to preschool next year, and if you are not potty trained you won’t get to go. And I think you are going to love it. Well, that’s a lie. You are going to hate it. Let’s face it; you are not crazy about most other kids. And large groups of kids your age tend to send you into paroxysms of anxious fury. After which you cling to the nearest adult like a life buoy in a sea of rabid sharks. With laser beams attached to their heads. Therefore, darling, you must go to preschool. You will adjust. Then you will love it, I promise.

You are getting along a little better with your brother this month. You still treat him as though he were a dangerous type of snake. But every now and then you psych yourself up and lean over and touch him. Carefully. While keeping your torso as far away from him as possible. Then you look up and wait for the Big People to go “Aww!” It cracks me up that he terrorizes you so much already. If he gets within a foot of you, you start shouting “He doesn’t want to get you!”
Here’s a tip, honey. You can run. He can’t. Enjoy it while it lasts. He’s crazy about you, though. And I know that when you are ready, you’re really going to have fun with him too. You’re just going about it the way you go about everything else. In your own sweet time.

I love you,

Mama